Just a random blog post.
So today I was catching up on my mounds of homework that are due to trips i have taken and the missed days of school and work have made my grades look like I've never studied or read a book in my life, and I, in my head, started procrastinating a little. Don't worry all my homework is done, extra credit, make up work, and actual home work (well i'm working on english when i'm done with this, the reading is almost done thanks to audio books). Any way, so my mind started wondering and my eyes wandered around the room and I kept looking at things in my room that I could or could not take with me to college. I think I'll take my NYC posters and my little ones of Carnegie Hall and Wicked, and I'll take my Carnegie Hall program that has my name in it, along with the pictures/picture frames I have of senior trip and last years Chamber choir, but I think I'll leave behind my Lady Gaga poster and my painting of Peter Pan. I don't want someone ruining that in Fredonia.
Anyway this has a purpose. It's not a laundry list of what i'm taking with me to college. I looked at my bed and thought, "wow, these really lame japanese fake kanji bedsheets from when i cared about that stuff in 7th grade are really lame and I don't want to take them to college", so I think I want to buy new bed stuff for college, because I want to have a dorm that looks like the ones they advertise even though they don't come that way.
Point is, is now I actually have a date in my callender where I am going to sit down and make a wish list of dorm room materials. After I made the date on my mac I realized how totally WEIRD it all was, just that I was actually thinking about this, that I signed my slip of paper that my dad is going to mail out that says, "Yes Fredonia, stop sending me 'COME HERE!' mail, I'm going to your school and you better like it. TAKE MY MONEY!" It's weird to think that in a few months I won't be here anymore. I'm not sad. things that I love are turning rotten and sour and becoming corrupt by people who don't have the willingness to put the love into the same things that I put in. Chamber for example. I remember 2 years ago, heck, last year, we cried often in class because we didn't sing notes, we made music. We sung songs to Mrs. Shaver about her retiring and she never realized that we sung for her, and even now the memory of that music makes me fight tears. this year I have no such luck in drawing up memories that bring tears to my eyes. So though I hate to leave things like Chamber, and the drama club, and Tech Crew, I'll be happy to say goodbye.
I'll visit, but, I certainly don't want to stay. not for the world.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Monday, March 26, 2012
Destiny-
So I had an actual written response to this that was better thought out that what I'm writing now, as now my brain feels like a scrambled mix of tired and incoherent script words and lord of the rings mythology. So i'll try my best to get something that actually makes sense into this blog, and so back to what I was saying, I left said sheet of paper with said written response, at school, in my english binder.
So, I think destiny plays a huge part in the lord of the rings books. For me it is really hard to argue this point without saying, "it's a book! The character's are controlled by destiny because destiny is the author, tollkien, is destiny. The characters can't travel outside of the writers mind and can't do anything he doesn't want them to do." But when you talk about the idea that literature is a mirror of real life, the only way you can continue to argue this is if you bring god into the argument- and I don't want to do that. If you bring God into the argument then the argument isn't about The Ring, or Frodo, or Lord of the Rings, or literature. It becomes an argument about God. So lets talk about destiny.
I want to write something that is an actual response not me just rambling on about how something can't be, as above. I think I should give my english teacher a bit of a break on my really long blogs.
So if we forget that the characters in lord of the rings are simply characters, if we think that they are in fact on earth and no controlled by a writer, then we can actually talk about destiny. With everything said, I still think destiny plays a big part in the story, and in literature and therefore our lives. I think we wouldn't be having this blog assignment and wouldn't have spent days of talking on destiny if destiny didn't play a role. Free will and destiny can be intertwined, I think. A lot of people say one thing and then you can argue "well what about free will" well... What about it? Why can you not have free will and destiny. I don't think destiny means that something is grabbing you and forcing you through life and you make these choices so you end up from point a to point b and you don't actually have any choice. I don't think that's true. To properly explain what is going on in my head, say for a moment, that destiny is a person. So you are born, and destiny and standing at the end of your life, at age 15, after a car accident. And destiny thinks, ok, this is how it's gonna be. But you, at age 15 decide that you don't want to go make up with your 17 year old boyfriend because he was a jerk, so you don't get in the car that destiny thought you'd get in and get in a car crash, that doesn't happen. YOu go into your house and you life till a ripe old age. People are wrong. So if we say destiny is a person, then can destiny be wrong? Why can't it be wrong? why can't you start out having a set destiny, but free will changes your destiny. I don't think it was every anyones destiny to end up homeless and hungry on the streets of L.A.
I hope I made sense. I don't know if I answered the blog post like I was supposed to.
So, I think destiny plays a huge part in the lord of the rings books. For me it is really hard to argue this point without saying, "it's a book! The character's are controlled by destiny because destiny is the author, tollkien, is destiny. The characters can't travel outside of the writers mind and can't do anything he doesn't want them to do." But when you talk about the idea that literature is a mirror of real life, the only way you can continue to argue this is if you bring god into the argument- and I don't want to do that. If you bring God into the argument then the argument isn't about The Ring, or Frodo, or Lord of the Rings, or literature. It becomes an argument about God. So lets talk about destiny.
I want to write something that is an actual response not me just rambling on about how something can't be, as above. I think I should give my english teacher a bit of a break on my really long blogs.
So if we forget that the characters in lord of the rings are simply characters, if we think that they are in fact on earth and no controlled by a writer, then we can actually talk about destiny. With everything said, I still think destiny plays a big part in the story, and in literature and therefore our lives. I think we wouldn't be having this blog assignment and wouldn't have spent days of talking on destiny if destiny didn't play a role. Free will and destiny can be intertwined, I think. A lot of people say one thing and then you can argue "well what about free will" well... What about it? Why can you not have free will and destiny. I don't think destiny means that something is grabbing you and forcing you through life and you make these choices so you end up from point a to point b and you don't actually have any choice. I don't think that's true. To properly explain what is going on in my head, say for a moment, that destiny is a person. So you are born, and destiny and standing at the end of your life, at age 15, after a car accident. And destiny thinks, ok, this is how it's gonna be. But you, at age 15 decide that you don't want to go make up with your 17 year old boyfriend because he was a jerk, so you don't get in the car that destiny thought you'd get in and get in a car crash, that doesn't happen. YOu go into your house and you life till a ripe old age. People are wrong. So if we say destiny is a person, then can destiny be wrong? Why can't it be wrong? why can't you start out having a set destiny, but free will changes your destiny. I don't think it was every anyones destiny to end up homeless and hungry on the streets of L.A.
I hope I made sense. I don't know if I answered the blog post like I was supposed to.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
The End
I Just finished James Frey's A Million Little Pieces, and I must say the book and a really good rhythm. I made two really poor graph's explaining (graph 1) Jame's emotional state as the book progresses, and (Graph 2), how you feel, as the reader, as the book progresses, how intense the book is as you read. Graph 1:
Neither of these graphs include the emotional strife you go through as a reader when reading the "epilogue". Which would probably look like how a heart rate looks on a heart rate monitor, and it's only a page and a quarter long. The "epilogue" just explains where the character in the book are now.
At one point in the book the therapists explain that only 15% of addicts actually recover, and remain sober, and the epilogue hits home on that issue. Characters you have grown attached to die, or end up in jail, some are part of the 15% and are perfectly fine, some characters that you thought you hated when you read the book get what they deserve but you still feel bad for them.
I think that some high schoolers don't think they will get addicted to drugs and alcohol, or sex, but addicts start somewhere. Addicts can, and do, start in highschool, and I think a lot of highschoolers don't think they'll get addicted but it's a real possibility. This book makes me think of the people I know that do things they shouldn't, and it makes me hope to God that it's just a phase, that they're not as hurt, and messed up, as these people in this book at turn out to be addicts. It's just... Sad. So little addicts make it to a happy sober life, it makes me sad.
Great book and I advise it to any book lover, and all highschoolers (even though it's language isn't school appropriate)
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Just a thought on kindness that James Brought me too
this'll be quick I promise. I read a lot tonight. Not gonna lie, I didn't finish the book like I was supposed to but I didn't realize how much i had to read so, I'll finish it tomorrow. I'm only 50 pages from the end. ANYWAY. I read past all the drama I wrote about earlier and got to this part where James met a new patient, a big guy with no left arm and half of his right, with tattoo's and was scary, even to a bunch of drug addicts, and was smelly...like, rotten flesh, hasn't bathed in a year, brushed his teeth with motor oil 4 years ago smelly. The description was brutal. The unit gets a big feast, for... basically no reason other than there is gonna be a TV fight they're all excited for (this is a big communion scene for my English teacher's knowledge), so they are all eating this big feast and stuffing their faces and James notices Sr.Scary Face and asks him if he wants James to get him some of the food. The man does NOT respond nicely. He yells and says F you and tells him everyone is just going to relapse in 6 months and it's all I lie. James just walked away (cause he's recovering and is strong and I love it and I cheered in my head when I read him walking away), but well... It made me mad.
It got me thinking about kindness most of all, over the annoyance I felt for this man I got thinking, in middle school we got fed this "Racheles Challenge" thing, which I honestly think they just pumped up to make us be kinder to one another, but they said that Rachelle was the kind of girl that came up to new kids who sat alone at lunch and invited them to sit with her and her friends no matter what they looked like. I have always tried to be like that, and I don't know if thats because of this Rachelles Challenge thing or if it's because my parents raised me to be a good human being, or if it's just in my genes, but I did think about how not many people do this. Yes we do this for foreign exchange students because they're exotic and cool, and for the transfers that are pretty and smell nice and are on the lacrosse team, but who does that for Sr. Scary Face? In 5th grade a girl transferred here and she was Jewish and a tad overweight and no one talked to her. I did, and my parents said they were really proud of me, and I've always tried to be like that. I just think about all the times I see kids either ignore the no so attractive, or fat, or smelly kid, and well... I think that's wrong. I've always tried to talk to those kids, the outcasts. Maybe that's why it made me mad when Sr. Scary Face yelled at James. He was just trying to be nice, I guess I identify with him in that moment, and I want to be the kind of person who can just walk away when someone says "F you" when I was only trying to be nice.
On a side note, You probably shouldn't take my word when I say "this'll be short" yeah. Sorry... That wasn't short. I'll work on it. Also, totally unrelated note, I'm writing this on my new mac book pro, and as I'm writing this, in my "dock" on the bottom of my screen, as I'm writing there is a reflection f my writing as I'm writing it. It's only a tad REALLY COOL!
Anyway. I'll blog about the end tomorrow. Probably.
It got me thinking about kindness most of all, over the annoyance I felt for this man I got thinking, in middle school we got fed this "Racheles Challenge" thing, which I honestly think they just pumped up to make us be kinder to one another, but they said that Rachelle was the kind of girl that came up to new kids who sat alone at lunch and invited them to sit with her and her friends no matter what they looked like. I have always tried to be like that, and I don't know if thats because of this Rachelles Challenge thing or if it's because my parents raised me to be a good human being, or if it's just in my genes, but I did think about how not many people do this. Yes we do this for foreign exchange students because they're exotic and cool, and for the transfers that are pretty and smell nice and are on the lacrosse team, but who does that for Sr. Scary Face? In 5th grade a girl transferred here and she was Jewish and a tad overweight and no one talked to her. I did, and my parents said they were really proud of me, and I've always tried to be like that. I just think about all the times I see kids either ignore the no so attractive, or fat, or smelly kid, and well... I think that's wrong. I've always tried to talk to those kids, the outcasts. Maybe that's why it made me mad when Sr. Scary Face yelled at James. He was just trying to be nice, I guess I identify with him in that moment, and I want to be the kind of person who can just walk away when someone says "F you" when I was only trying to be nice.
On a side note, You probably shouldn't take my word when I say "this'll be short" yeah. Sorry... That wasn't short. I'll work on it. Also, totally unrelated note, I'm writing this on my new mac book pro, and as I'm writing this, in my "dock" on the bottom of my screen, as I'm writing there is a reflection f my writing as I'm writing it. It's only a tad REALLY COOL!
Anyway. I'll blog about the end tomorrow. Probably.
A little something to think about
I am in the midst of reading my book, A Million Little Pieces, and something happened and I wanted to write something about it before it left my mind. The past 3 days of me reading this book have been really special. I think I stopped reading this book right around the time where James stops his wreckless behavior and starts getting better. The past 3 days I’ve noticed little things that show that he is getting better. Little things, like, slowly, he’s being able to look himself in the eyes, which he hasn’t done in Years. His scars are healing which is so full of symbolism it makes me want to burst. His “Fury” is calming and he is learning to deal with it, he can stand to be around his parents, to let them hug him, to let them help him, and something he doesn’t say outright in the book. He finally tells Lily, the girl he’s seeing but isn’t supposed to be seeing, that he loves her. Last time I read the book (in the summer) he couldn’t say it, he was just so indecisive. It was always “I don’t know” or “maybe” or “does it matter”? with James, and you can tell he’s getting better just by him making the decision that yes, figuring out your emotions and telling someone how you feel is important.
Now, this is not why I wanted to write this blog post. Instead, I wanted to write about something else. This may be a Spoiler but this is for my English class so, SPOILER ALERT, I’m reading this, and after Lily and James get caught together (nothing bad, they were just in the forest and she was crying about her grandma and he told her he loved her and then the unit people came and got mad), and James chills in his room for 2 hours waiting for the unit guy (i don’t know what to call him, he probably has a title but James just calls him Lincoln. So his name is Lincoln) to come and get him so he can yell at James. After 2 hours of him telling himself he’s not going to leave and escape the yelling and just go get messed up, Lincoln finally comes and tells James he’s ready for him in his office. SO-James goes to the office only to find the news that James is not going to be kicked out even though he broke one of the cardinal rules, don’t talk to women, as long as he doesn’t brake any more rules. James is cool with that, which is another step towards his recovery, but that’s a seperate thing anyway, but then James finds out Lily has left. Not because she was kicked out, but Lily has left because she can no longer see James. Now THIS is what I want to blog about. James tells Lincoln “I know where she’s going, I can go get her and bring her back and you guys can help her” Lincoln says now, and, in a polite “this is for class” way, he says Screw you to Lincoln, tells him off for not wanting to help someone in English desperate need of help, and leaves. This is where I stopped to blog. James was making such progress, and to leave, it kind of breaks my heart. At the same time he’s doing a good deed, he’s trying to help Lily. It just makes me think of the stupid things we as humans do when we’re in love. We talked about this today in psychology. About doing dumb things, things we would never otherwise do, but when we are in love, logic just goes out the window and even though you may think you’re doing the right thing you are really doing something stupid. I just thought it was so interesting that he just got up and left. There a million reasons for James to stay, not only for his sobriety but he is a wanted man and the people at the rehab center are working it out for him trying to reduce his prison time that he has to do when he gets out. If he leaves, where is he gonna be in that situation? James doesn’t even think about that though. He just thinks about helping Lily. That brings to me to another psychology thing. Freud said that you never truly do anything for anyone else, you always have some ulterior motive that will help you if you help someone else. Where is James being helped here? Freud was wrong about a lot of things, and I think in some cases the being nice thing is right but not always and he is one of the cases where it isn’t. James is screwing himself by helping Lily, but he’s doing it anyway.
Now, this is not why I wanted to write this blog post. Instead, I wanted to write about something else. This may be a Spoiler but this is for my English class so, SPOILER ALERT, I’m reading this, and after Lily and James get caught together (nothing bad, they were just in the forest and she was crying about her grandma and he told her he loved her and then the unit people came and got mad), and James chills in his room for 2 hours waiting for the unit guy (i don’t know what to call him, he probably has a title but James just calls him Lincoln. So his name is Lincoln) to come and get him so he can yell at James. After 2 hours of him telling himself he’s not going to leave and escape the yelling and just go get messed up, Lincoln finally comes and tells James he’s ready for him in his office. SO-James goes to the office only to find the news that James is not going to be kicked out even though he broke one of the cardinal rules, don’t talk to women, as long as he doesn’t brake any more rules. James is cool with that, which is another step towards his recovery, but that’s a seperate thing anyway, but then James finds out Lily has left. Not because she was kicked out, but Lily has left because she can no longer see James. Now THIS is what I want to blog about. James tells Lincoln “I know where she’s going, I can go get her and bring her back and you guys can help her” Lincoln says now, and, in a polite “this is for class” way, he says Screw you to Lincoln, tells him off for not wanting to help someone in English desperate need of help, and leaves. This is where I stopped to blog. James was making such progress, and to leave, it kind of breaks my heart. At the same time he’s doing a good deed, he’s trying to help Lily. It just makes me think of the stupid things we as humans do when we’re in love. We talked about this today in psychology. About doing dumb things, things we would never otherwise do, but when we are in love, logic just goes out the window and even though you may think you’re doing the right thing you are really doing something stupid. I just thought it was so interesting that he just got up and left. There a million reasons for James to stay, not only for his sobriety but he is a wanted man and the people at the rehab center are working it out for him trying to reduce his prison time that he has to do when he gets out. If he leaves, where is he gonna be in that situation? James doesn’t even think about that though. He just thinks about helping Lily. That brings to me to another psychology thing. Freud said that you never truly do anything for anyone else, you always have some ulterior motive that will help you if you help someone else. Where is James being helped here? Freud was wrong about a lot of things, and I think in some cases the being nice thing is right but not always and he is one of the cases where it isn’t. James is screwing himself by helping Lily, but he’s doing it anyway.
I’ve done dumb stuff for love before, I’ve done dumb stuff for love, and dumb stuff out of anger, I guess it might be interesting to pose the question, “Take a step back and look at your life and your decisions... Were they all rational? What did you do that was just... dumb?”
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
I can't read today, So Instead, I may talk about Christmas...
So yea, blah blah blah, I've been super busy and havn't gotten a chance to get to my dad's house to get my book. So, today I cannot read my book in class, and yesterday I blogged about my book... extensivly... So instead I'll blog about something... obscure.
Maybe not too obscure, as Christmas is only 4 days away.
My birthday is on Christmas, and Christmas is my favorite holliday. It's not my favorite because it's my birthday. It's my favorite because everything changes at Christmas. People get nicer, there's snow on the ground (well... not this year, but I'll get to that), and there is a feeling in the air that no other time of year has. I love the decorations on and in houses, heck, my dad's dining room and living room look like Santa's own home, theres lights and garland and wreathes, and snowmen, and wisemen, pictures of family, stocking and of course the Christmas tree.
I don't know why Christmas has a special feel to it, but there really is just... something in the air. December roles around, Chamber Singers starts doing concerts for people every weekend, I have my anual birthday blowout and snow starts to fall, and all the peices of Christmas start to fall into place and it becomes such a magical time of year.
On the subject of snow: People who want a green Christmas, or want to spend it in California or Hawaii or Florida... Get out. I cannot imagine a green Christmas. I hate when in my home town of Snowsville, New York, there's no snow.It's only happend a few times, but let me tell you, my 18th birthday is not the time. I hope we get hit with a blizzard soon or I'm gonna be upset. The snow really adds to the magic of Christmas and without it there... It's just a day to be with the family and exchange gifts for one another.
I've become a bit of a birthday snob this year, cause it's my 18th and I'm excited and I've been looking forward to this since I was 8. I don't know if I rushed through my high school and middle school years. I spent them enjoying the good times and trying to get through the bad ones, but always waiting untill my Senior year so I could do the fun highschool stuff then get out and move on to better things. I've been over this whole small town thing for years. ANYWAY. I made a huge deal out of my last big birthday party (it really was big, i don't know how many people showed up it was so big), and I've been making a big deal out of Christmas for my actual birthday too. But hey, I figure, it's my 18th, its a big deal, it's my last one before I go to college. To me it's a big deal. But I digress... Birthday Snob.
Last but not least I'm happy to say I will be spending my Christmas doing a very... Christmasy thing. I wont say names but me and a few of my very special friends are going to visit another very special, very important person in all of our lives on Christmas who will be alone. We hope to make said persons Christmas. It warms my heart to know that on Christmas I will be doing more than celebrating my birthday and getting/giving gifts. I'll be... hopefully... truely making someones day.
Merry Christmas
Maybe not too obscure, as Christmas is only 4 days away.
My birthday is on Christmas, and Christmas is my favorite holliday. It's not my favorite because it's my birthday. It's my favorite because everything changes at Christmas. People get nicer, there's snow on the ground (well... not this year, but I'll get to that), and there is a feeling in the air that no other time of year has. I love the decorations on and in houses, heck, my dad's dining room and living room look like Santa's own home, theres lights and garland and wreathes, and snowmen, and wisemen, pictures of family, stocking and of course the Christmas tree.
I don't know why Christmas has a special feel to it, but there really is just... something in the air. December roles around, Chamber Singers starts doing concerts for people every weekend, I have my anual birthday blowout and snow starts to fall, and all the peices of Christmas start to fall into place and it becomes such a magical time of year.
On the subject of snow: People who want a green Christmas, or want to spend it in California or Hawaii or Florida... Get out. I cannot imagine a green Christmas. I hate when in my home town of Snowsville, New York, there's no snow.It's only happend a few times, but let me tell you, my 18th birthday is not the time. I hope we get hit with a blizzard soon or I'm gonna be upset. The snow really adds to the magic of Christmas and without it there... It's just a day to be with the family and exchange gifts for one another.
I've become a bit of a birthday snob this year, cause it's my 18th and I'm excited and I've been looking forward to this since I was 8. I don't know if I rushed through my high school and middle school years. I spent them enjoying the good times and trying to get through the bad ones, but always waiting untill my Senior year so I could do the fun highschool stuff then get out and move on to better things. I've been over this whole small town thing for years. ANYWAY. I made a huge deal out of my last big birthday party (it really was big, i don't know how many people showed up it was so big), and I've been making a big deal out of Christmas for my actual birthday too. But hey, I figure, it's my 18th, its a big deal, it's my last one before I go to college. To me it's a big deal. But I digress... Birthday Snob.
Last but not least I'm happy to say I will be spending my Christmas doing a very... Christmasy thing. I wont say names but me and a few of my very special friends are going to visit another very special, very important person in all of our lives on Christmas who will be alone. We hope to make said persons Christmas. It warms my heart to know that on Christmas I will be doing more than celebrating my birthday and getting/giving gifts. I'll be... hopefully... truely making someones day.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
A Million Little Peices
I've been reading A Million Little Peices by James Fry for a while, at least over the summer. I havn't finished it yet because of my inability to read fast, and my lack of free time. I read it by the pool practically my entire summer vacation, and I've made it about half way through, a little farther I guess... it's been since summer that I have picked it up. I found out about this book last year when I did an independant reading project for my junior year (last year) english class. I was already reading a book, Impulse, but when my teacher did a slide show of books worth reading, A million Little Peices jumped out to me, and I went out and bought it so I could read it in my free time. The reason it jumped out to me is because it's about drug and alchohol addiction, and for my carrer I want to help people with those problems, I want to me a psychologist for addicts. A ways into reading this book my parents told me that this book was famous for being a fraud. James Fry titled this book as a biography, but it wasn't... well... not really. Instead it was a compilation of his own recovery stories, and recovery stories of people he met. I guess that makes sence when you read the book. There are so many times in the book where you can't help but think "He is so messed up, how can he possibly get better? How can he possibly be well enough to write a book. His rock bottom was so low, and he hit it so many times that how does a person recover completley from that." So when I found out that it wasn't really a biography but a compilation of a bunch of real experiences all jumbled up into James Fry's fictional self, I wasn't too bothered by the fact. When I think about it I really don't see how he could have titled it any other way, because in a way it is a biography, but it's also an autobiography because it tells of other peoples stories, but it's also a fiction because James Fry didn't do everything he said he did in the book because some of his actions were those of people that he met in real life. How do you write that on a book cover? "A Million Little Peices- a biography, autobiography, fiction, and everything in between" No one would read that. I guess he could have just left the "A Biography" off the cover page and just let it sit in a fiction or biography section of the library and wait for a curious soul like Oprah to pick it up and make it famous.
So, like I said I havn't looked at this book in a while, about 3 months, so the details of the book are kind of fuzzy. After reading two english books that are total mind ... messer-upers, like The Stranger, and The Curious Case of the Dog in the Nightime, the details of a book like A Million Little Peices seem to fade away. I do remember the great underlying love story that James dips into detail ever so often. Without any spoilers, he slowly reveals to the reader that he met the girl of his dreams in college, and that his drinking and drug use messed it all up. She tried to get him sober, and for a while it worked. But... once and addict y'know? I remember thinking, as the love tragedy slowly unfolded, "I can't blame her", but thinking too, "How horrible must he have felt". The story is enough to make you cry.
Along with the love story, There is a 2, maybe 3, possibly 4 page long description of James' experience of 2 root canals, all done with no anesthesia. This is DETAILED, let me tell you. I read it and it was like a car crash, or like watching the Jersey shore, You just can't look away, but while you're looking at it you're thinking "dear god make it stop, this is so horrible and awful". And it can't be any other way, He couldn't have writen this description like, "and they sawed some nerves in half and had to hold me down with straps and it hurt a lot" No. There was about 4 pages of him repeating the F word and I think he used the terms "red hot pain" and "white hot pain" about 50 times per page. How else can you convey a root canal with no medication.
The book is really amazing and I can't wait to finish it.
So, like I said I havn't looked at this book in a while, about 3 months, so the details of the book are kind of fuzzy. After reading two english books that are total mind ... messer-upers, like The Stranger, and The Curious Case of the Dog in the Nightime, the details of a book like A Million Little Peices seem to fade away. I do remember the great underlying love story that James dips into detail ever so often. Without any spoilers, he slowly reveals to the reader that he met the girl of his dreams in college, and that his drinking and drug use messed it all up. She tried to get him sober, and for a while it worked. But... once and addict y'know? I remember thinking, as the love tragedy slowly unfolded, "I can't blame her", but thinking too, "How horrible must he have felt". The story is enough to make you cry.
Along with the love story, There is a 2, maybe 3, possibly 4 page long description of James' experience of 2 root canals, all done with no anesthesia. This is DETAILED, let me tell you. I read it and it was like a car crash, or like watching the Jersey shore, You just can't look away, but while you're looking at it you're thinking "dear god make it stop, this is so horrible and awful". And it can't be any other way, He couldn't have writen this description like, "and they sawed some nerves in half and had to hold me down with straps and it hurt a lot" No. There was about 4 pages of him repeating the F word and I think he used the terms "red hot pain" and "white hot pain" about 50 times per page. How else can you convey a root canal with no medication.
The book is really amazing and I can't wait to finish it.
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